November 8, 2008

Wake up, time to die...

Kind of a depressing tag line for an opener perhaps, but frankly it kind summarizes my whole mode of thought now. Life’s way too short to miss out on the majority of it sitting behind a slab of particle board in a small padded cubicle with no windows, listening to other people’s inane conversations or babbling talk radio, working on projects that ultimately can’t possibly satisfy.

A new acquaintance of mine described me as a romantic, and maybe I am, if it means I’m inclined to pursue something most people consider unrealistic or even impossible. I guess it is romantic to believe I can live my life in such a way that the necessity of making money in order to live doesn’t circumscribe, fetter and ultimately define the life it enables.

Rather, I want my work and my life to balance and reinforce each other. I think that means freedom to move around more. It means partnering with people who share the vision of work that’s not constrained by arbitrary rules and policies or prescribed by inscrutable superiors.

I’ve been relatively lucky in my work life, in all honesty, but it still hasn't been enough. So maybe I’m not so much romantic as difficult, hard to satisfy. I’ll admit it… I’ve got high standards for what life could and ought to be like, and maybe I pine for a world that doesn’t really exist.

In the end though, we create our own lives, and if the world I want doesn’t exist, I’m just going to have to do everything I can to build it myself, one piece at a time, until I’m in it.

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